In the weeks since I deactivated my Facebook account (and deleted Twitter, Next Door, and LinkedIn), I can’t say that I’ve missed any of them. Although muscle memory still has me reaching for the phone sometimes, it’s been surprisingly easy to set it back down. The only time I truly miss social media is when I think about those with whom it’s been our only remaining connection. You’ve been the reason I stayed for so long. Overall though, turning away from Zuckerberg and his ilk has been worth the pangs of regret. Now it just remains to explain, and to say goodbye, so long.
Initially, I got off to find quiet, peace. I was tired of Libertarians, Republicans, Democrats, and Progressives. I was tired of overlooking all the ways we disagree, of being told how to think, how to act. Being Switzerland in this uncivil war has been a hard gig. So after these recent weeks of peace, the longer I’ve spent here, the more unwilling I am to return.
Look, I’ve got over 1,500 friends on Facebook. Running for and serving in elected office has expanded my list. Some of you are dear friends, others are political allies (and enemies), and some of you, to be frank I don’t even know. This is for all of you.
To my old friends in California and Chile and beyond, I have loved keeping up with your adventures, your families. I’ve enjoyed preserving our friendships – whether our values align or not. Our relationships mean more to me than anything. One of my great joys is to have witnessed how time has caused peer groups to let loose from horrid mean-boy, mean-girl divisions that separated us in grammar and high school. As you have embraced each other as people of great worth and shared history, it’s been a joy to see what fine people each of you have become.
To members of my family with whom I’ve kept in touch through social media, I’m sorry we’ll no longer have a common platform upon which to exchange photos and stay connected. I guess we’ll have to figure out another way. There will be some of us who choose not to continue communicating. That’s ok too. Each and every one of you has been part of making me what I’ve come to be. We share precious memories and always will. Thank you.
To my political family, some of the best times of my life have been in working toward common goals. Some of you are Republican, some are Democrats, and some long ago left allegiance to either. We’ve prayed together, campaigned together, laughed (and cried) together. I’ve worked my heart out to help your husbands, your wives, and you win elected office. You’ve done the same for me. That said, I’m ready to get off this train. People no longer want to elect those who seek common ground. I no longer want to serve in such a system. Should things ever change I may reconsider, but I no longer expect they will.
To former constituents (friends and otherwise) and my governmental family, I shall miss you deeply. I couldn’t serve without becoming joined to you and your best welfare whether it fits the platform and talking points of a party or not. I still want the best for you, but you are in the hands of others now. I’ll pray for wisdom and compassion to be demonstrated in them, and for our future too. Thank you for voting for me and supporting me even when you didn’t understand (or agree with) my positions and actions.
So this is so long and for some of us, it is also goodbye. I still feel a passion for calling us to our better selves, to remind us of who we once were and can again be if (and when) we’re willing. I am still a compulsive communicator. Can you imagine me leaving writing behind? Naah, that’s not happening. I’ll continue posting on http://www.terimurrison.com. If you like, visit me there and subscribe to my blog. Share them if and wherever you like.
Going quiet has helped me hear my own voice (and God’s) for a change. My voice is saying it’s time to leave social media. I will miss you. Goodbye. And so long.
Teri, I had a feeling that’s what you decided to do. At first when I no longer saw your posts I went to my friends list and you weren’t there and thought you unfriended me 😢 then I checked Alice’s friends list and you weren’t there either, so I figured you must have gotten tired of the bs and left. I’m glad you wrote this. So, now I understand it wasn’t us. I’m starting to think of doing the same and maybe look into an alternative to Facebook. I wish you and your loving Professor the best that life has to offer. I won’t say goodbye but see you later on your blogs.
Take care of yourself,
Oh Eva! Thank you for your reply! No, it wasn’t any of you! Have you seen the Social Media documentary on Netflix?! That was also a major motivator. I’m glad you’re keeping me on the blog!!! Hugs!
No goodbye and so long from me. And I’m happy to ‘just’ see what you have to say via your blog. I always look forward to the announcement that you’ve posted something again. I must add that the last post I read (sigh, I can’t recall the topic—elections I think) really made me sad and I wanted to reach out to you. Again and again. And then it was several weeks later and then……… Procrastination or waiting for just that right moment and mood to comment.
And now today’s post. Excellent. If I didn’t attempt to promote my stamping biz on FB I could pretty much gladly leave it as well. But I keep on plugging looking for a few new customers via by business site.
No big head now but you must know I’ve always admired your integrity and presence in what you do. I was rather deflated when you didn’t rightfully win the election here, shortly after we’d moved to Idaho. And the way others popped in at the very end to sabotage you. Ugh. Again, I didn’t reach out but I thought about you lots, especially the times when I’d drive by your house en route to my long long time friend’s home in Star. I also think of you when I drive through the intersection on Eagle Rd and State St. because that’s just about where we had our breakfast together before we moved here.
I want to be on your ‘keep in touch’ list!!!! I’m on the blog email list thankfully. Seriously let’s have coffee (is that a possibility in these covid days?) so I can catch up on your life and you on mine. The latter isn’t terribly exciting! But we are making new friends. And my daughter and family (minus the father of the children now) are in Hidden Springs and it’s great to be here and be able to offer support to her. And heck…….maybe one time I’ll actually meet the Professor! 🙂 I’m so glad he pulled through his bout with the corona virus. It wasn’t fun reading about it from my side and I’m sure it wasn’t pleasant from your side. We have been totally spared from it touching us or any immediate family thus far.
Now I really must get to the day’s chore of finding the top of my desk and much of the floor space in my office, aka stamp room. I’ve procrastinated long enough doing other piddly chores like putting Halloween away and getting out Thanksgiving.
Hugs to you my friend,
Love you, my friend! Thank you for the ways you expressed friendship to me above. I treasure our relationship so! Yes to coffee anytime!
I actually considered not posting this, but then I would remember someone that I care about and I wanted them to know I didn’t succumb to COVID or something!
See you soon, I hope!
I understand completely, as I sometimes feel like seeing people arguing on FB is wearing on me too. I wish you and your family well, and hope you can make it to our next class reunion. Take care 😉
I’m no Pollyanna, Mary, but it doesn’t have to be that way. I have noticed an increased optimism in me since stepping away. I can’t help but believe that something that could be used to bring us together has had a major role in tearing us down. I will definitely put the next reunion on the top of my list. Thank you for being you. I have been delighted to know you better!
You’re brave and smart, Terri. Plus, you’ve got a beautiful life to enjoy. I’ve often thought of giving up on Facebook mostly because I’ve gotten in so much trouble with it. Too many family contacts to let go of though. Nobody writes letters anymore.
Thank you, dear friend! I’ve mostly avoided trouble, but that doesn’t mean it’s always been pleasurable. What has been pleasurable is renewing our relationship, learning how thing turned out for you. In many ways, I left part of my heart with all of you in Santiago. You’re right, no one writes letters anymore. I’m so glad Monica organized our Nido Zoom calls. Te amo muchisimo!